Bleach It Baby

No, I'm not talking about your lady tash. Although we'll get to that in another post soon.

I'm talking about the stuff that makes your house smell like you've set up home in a public swimming baths without expecting to see floating plasters, toe nails and the odd diamond. Diamonds are hauls you'll generally only find in posh pools.

There are many things I am good at, passionate about and therefore prone to indulging in on a regular basis. Sampling red wine is one such predilection. Cleaning is not. I have, however, over the years become exceptionally good and passionate about delegating it to people far more proficient at it than me. They are my cleaner and when financial bribery is called for, my small tribe of children.

It's come as somewhat of a surprise therefore that I've become a little obsessed with cleaning the house like some rubber-gloved zealot. It's not natural and my family know that. I've seen them staring at me from afar (you don't get in the path of me and my bleach) wondering at what point they should make the call to the men with the white coats to take me somewhere safe. It was utter confusion when I practically raced into the house to unveil the new gift I'd bought for myself.

Meet my new partner in cleaning crime. Don't you love it? The thrill was nothing short of the excitement I felt at getting my brunette Girls World. Actually my first taste of champagne comes a close second.

But it doesn't stop there. I've become Karcher's most prolific unpaid (and anonymous ) sales agent. Don't make the mistake of admiring my crystal clean windows and then standing still long enough for me to give you a full demo of the Karcher WV5 Premium Window Vacuum Cleaner. I'm not on commission  but if my career hits the rocks, you know where to find me.

When the gloves, bleach and hoover are out and with The Verves' 'The Drugs Don't Work' cranked up to the max The Pause isn't such a bad place to be.

So, get your bleach on babes and release the cleaning beast!